Hearts, Ribs, and a Mansion.

Happy Valentine’s Day! Although I have never claimed to big a huge celebrator of Valentines Day, today has already proven to be a GREAT holiday. I woke up early this morning to take Simon out, and saw something on my windshield! At first, in the dark of the early morning, I thought trash had blown on my car! As I walked closer, I saw that it was a dozen red roses underneath my windshield wipers and a gift bag with the sweetest card (seriously, Shane, where do you always find these great cards!?) and a BEAUTIFUL bracelet I have been wanting! I was quite surprised and full of those giddy, in-love feelings, even at 6 a.m. I’ve said it before and I will say it again, when you know, you know. 

I saw something online the other day about all the things a woman is. How they are strong but caring, persistent, nurturing, fighters, friends, and supporters. Truthfully, I didn’t read very much of those parts because one line grabbed my attention so strongly. 

Woman was made from man’s rib so he can guard her heart. 

Think about that for a minute. Think about the role of your ribcage… it covers your heart! Your ribs protect the heart beneath them, not because they are better or have a more important job, or even call the shots in any way. A heart knows it is safe beneath the ribs because they have proven their strength against outside danger. Without the ribs, a heart is exposed, vulnerable, susceptible to harm. 

We know that God spoke to his people in examples and metaphors they could easily understand. My favorite of these is in John 14:2- In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going.”

At the time this was written, if a young man wanted to marry a woman, he settled a dowry with her father and then he went away. He built an addition onto his father’s house that he thought would be suitable for his betrothed. When finished, her father would come and approve that it was good enough for his daughter. Meanwhile, the girl had no idea when her betrothed would come back for her. So she would keep a candle in her window so that he would know where she was and that she was anxiously awaiting him. When the addition was finished being built, the young man and all other young men in the town would run up to her house in the middle of the night with music and dancing and loud cymbals! They were announcing his arrival and she would finally be with her love after so much time of wondering. 

When Jesus said this to his people, he knew it was a language that they would understand. “I am going to prepare a place for you.” The groom is anxiously waiting to bring his bride to the mansion He has built for her. And when He does come back for her, it will be a loud homecoming! 

1 Thessalonians 4:16- For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a cry of command, with the voice of an archangel, and with the sound of the trumpet of God.

This is why I love the saying I heard so much. Yes, woman is strong, can endure tremendous pain, can fight for what she wants and still have the touch to sooth and comfort. But we need protection. We need someone with strength and armor when we just can’t fight anymore. That is why Eve was created from Adams ribs… not only is she a part of him, she needs him, too. Her heart needs the comfort of his ribs. 

Someone I trust very much once told me, “Don’t look for the cracks in his armor. Look for someone who will guard and protect your heart.” 

Men aren’t perfect, and I sure am glad they don’t expect women to be, either. But what I know for sure- when you find a man who does everything in his power to look out for you, protect you from harm, and love you like you have never been loved before- you found a man for life. Because a heart would never leave the comfort of the ribs protecting it, and the ribs would never do anything to leave their sacred post.

This is what true love is. God, as always, nailed it right on the head.

Kooks of a Feather Laugh Together

I am a self-proclaimed writer. Writers write. They create stories, describe situations, and a lot of times- tell exaggerated, over-the-top INTERESTING accounts of life because we love an audience! Am I right? Anyone? ::Crickets:: See, I’m just not as funny without an audience. 

I don’t believe in love at first sight, but I was pretty sure Shane was the one for me after our first date. Not only was he accomplished and charming, open the car door for me and show up in an ironed shirt, he thought I was funny! He was generally interested in what I had to say and never in my life had I sat across the table from someone more enveloped in the words coming out of my mouth. As I drove home later that night, I called my mom and said, “Mom! He thinks I’m funny! The man said I was better than T.V.!” 

I knew it would work out because some people just don’t get my humor. They don’t think I’m as humorous as I intend to be. Sometimes I forget to laugh at my own jokes, and people take my sarcasm for… the opposite of sarcasm. 

One of my goals has always been to write a book and- MARK MY WORDS- I will! Perhaps I should put a time frame on it- before I’m 30. Well, crap, that would add another time-consuming goal to the next 6 years of my life (the other being having kids and being out of diapers by my 30^th birthday. I feel as if I am running out of time on that one…) 

I have started a few books, but have yet to get to a point where they STICK. I believe they have a term for this… Ah, yes, writer’s block. Can I get an “amen”?? I’ll look for some more resources on this and keep trudging along… some of those ideas are too dang good to walk away from. 

Recently, my mother and I have toyed with the idea of co-writing a book about our crazy adventures. If you’ve ever read my blog, you know she and I have quite a few of them! Let’s face it- we’re hilarious! Okay, maybe it’s just hilarious that we think we’re so funny. Either way, we could sure fill up some pages. I know how this book would go, though. My beautiful, fun, witty, princess of a mother would describe all these wild scenarios in which she ate wonderful pastries, met helpful wait staff, and bedazzled whatever she could get her hands on. I would write about how irresponsible she was, the sense of urgency I (unsuccessfully) tried to ESP to her, and how she makes me late for everything. Honestly, is it so hard to get an 8-year-old in her Hippie Chick costume to the party on time so she can save face!? Missing out on a few Cheetos and a game of MASH is not to be taken lightly. 

The woman has no sense of time, or knows her way around a sewing machine. But boy, can she dress, accessorize, decorate, charm the pants off of anyone, and bedazzle! What she has, I sure don’t, and perhaps vice versa.  I think this is what makes us the best of friends. 

She gave me a decorated plaque that I have hanging in my closet beside my full-length mirror so I can read it every day. “I am blessed because you are my daughter and also my friend.”  It’s not every day you come across a relationship that not only are we forced to know each other because I am part of her, was formed in her womb, but we choose to be close. We choose to reveal our secrets to one another, cry together, and more importantly, laugh together. She makes me a better woman because she showed me what a graceful, loving, attractive, and fun woman looks like. We’re two of a kind… even if deep down, we’re both just a couple of kooks.

Mistletoe and Match.Com

As we know, thanks to the abundance of diamond commercials that have been splashed on my television screen, and- hello! Have you checked your Facebook newsfeed lately?- we are in engagement season!

Which is why, I, Libby Morris, have an announcement to make....!!

...I am NOT engaged. But thanks for asking... again. Really, I never get tired of telling people, "no, not yet"... (sarcasm. dripping sarcasm.)

I called my best friend today, and instead of answering the phone like someone normally would, ("Hello?") she answered it, "are you engaged yet??"

Funny. But not funny. Har har.

Winter sets a romantic stage, I get it. The lights, the snow, the mistletoe. Romance is in the air and the holiday sales at Zales and Jared are helpful in setting that stage, too, I'm sure. I'd be lying if it didn't cross my mind as my Significant Other and I walked through the decorated Boston Public Garden and stole a kiss under George Washington's statue. (Okay, that part's not very romantic, but hey- it's us.) But just because the season is right, the person is right,  and I'm  sure he can catch the ESP's of my ring size I'm sending to his brain, doesn't necessarily mean the timing is right.

Since I found my one-and-only, I can say pretty confidently that some people fall in love with the idea of love before they actually fall into the real thing. I can understand how easily this can happen to, with movies, mistletoe, and match.com.

I heard a song recently that said, "if you don't have two kids by twenty-one, you're probably gonna die alone." As ridiculous as it might sound, I think this fear is very real for people. So they search. And they jump. And they fall...hard.

Internet dating can be very helpful for some people who are confident, secure in who they are and where their life is, and know exactly what they are looking for. I've seen it work. I think though, for the most part, it creates more problems than it solves. It makes so many people accessible to momentarily fulfill your romantic needs, it takes the fright and kahounas out of communication, and gives people the opportunity to paint an unrealistic picture of themselves. The problem you then face is having a handful of interests at your fingertips, no commitment, no assurance in what is real and what isn't, and no accountability to make a decision and pick someone! You are constantly being "winked" at by so many people, banter ensues, phone numbers are exchanged, and next thing you know, you have 17 dates lined up in the span of 3 days and you can't keep them all straight. Suddenly, it becomes so easy to forget the reason you signed up for the site in the first place- to find your ONE and ONLY.

Mistletoe and matchmaking go hand-in-hand. This season awakens the hopeless romantic in all of us, but it also reminds me of a verse in Songs of Solomon: "do not arise or awaken love before it so desires." 

Don't go searching for something you may not be ready to find yet. Take your time. Let love find you. It sounds like a cliche, but I promise you it's true- when I met Shane, I had just done a lot of soul-searching, a lot of work and exploration of who I am and where I wanted to be, and the last thing on my mind was meeting the man of my dreams. Of course, as life so often works, that was exactly when he found me. When I wasn't looking and was least expecting it.

Say, "Uncle!"

I think I should perhaps rename my blog "The Long List of Libby's Quirks." I feel like I present new ones to you every other entry. It's not that I focus on the negative, but rather, am embracing all aspects of my personality and really getting to know myself more everyday. It's a process and a journey... if you haven't really begun a journey similar, I challenge you to.

I have known for quite sometime that I am a planner. I plan ahead for everything... which explains my overloaded purse (I'm sure one of these days that floss, deodorant, and letter opener will come in handy!), my inability to throw away boxes, Christmas cards sent prior to December 1, and my oh-so extensive Pinterest boards. I love to plan. Sue me.

This quirk comes in handy at times like preparing for a trip, taking my good friend's baby to his first Christmas parade, and when birthday's roll around (happens every year, you know.) Other times, however, I know my ultra-planning gets in the way.

I'd like to say I am a flexible person. I would love to tell you I am a fly-by-the-seat-of-her-pants type gal who "goes with the flow" and says things like, "Whatever happens, happens. No big deal." I would love to lie and tell you all of those things but frankly, I'm much too neurotically type-A.

You all know I love a good glass of wine or girly cocktail from time to time. I would never get drunk though, for one simple reason: I hate to feel out of control. I hate being out of control of my emotions, of my body, of my plans, of my laundry, of the traffic that doesn't realize I have somewhere to be. Being out of control is not ever something I enjoy experiencing (unless of course, I'm on a ride at Busch Gardens. Completely different can of worms.)

With life being what it is, I have to let myself be out of control from time to time. It just comes with this crazy territory. I would like my hand to be in everything relating to Libby, but it just is so often not the case. And that is such a hard pill to swallow.

In life, jobs, family, relationships, restaurants, and traffic- you don't always get to sit in the driver's seat. You don't always get to be chef. You don't always get to be the one calling the shots, making the plays, and creating the itenerary. Sometimes, you just have to say, "Uncle."


...."uncle."

Attracting Bees with Honey Comes Full Circle

Boy, do I love it when things come full circle, or I hear that someone actually listened to what I had to say! (It doesn't happen very often. Trust me.)

You may remember my post about my life saying: "you attract more bees with honey than vinegar." (If not, you can read it here.) My mother is the most graceful, poised woman who ALWAYS (I repeat: ALWAYS) gets what she wants. Being her spawn, it has proven to be annoying from time to time, but that is neither here nor there.

I can only take lessons from the master of attracting bees with honey, so take lessons I have! But I'll go one step further, I have decided to share these lessons.

A few weeks ago, a co-worker friend of mine was discussing the woes and frustrations of moving into a new house that was previously inhabited by extreme messy bessies. She wasn't getting very far with the property management and was about at the end of her rope. I shared with her a story of my mother, just one example of her amazing ways that leaves you with the tunnel eyes you see in cartoons..."yes ma'am...I want to do whatever will make you happy...your wish is my command..."

My mother was attempting to use a flight voucher for an upcoming trip. The woman on the phone told her she needed to drive to the airport and complete the transaction there. She drove the 45 minutes to the airport and when there, the American Airlines ticket counter was vacant. Walking around to another counter, she found two American Airline workers who looked like they were about at the end of their shift.

"Can you two help me, please?"
"Our computers aren't on."
"I drove all this way and the woman on the phone said this transaction needs to be completed here. Why don't we put our heads together and come up with a solution?" (Oh, those magic words.)
After a moment of silence, "Oh, okay, I can go log into the computer. Come on."

The trick here was that she didn't raise her voice, she didn't demand anything, but rather, she formulated her request as an act of teamwork. Genius. Of course they were going to help her then!If she had talked down to them, got irritated, or started barking demands, those airline workers would have shut down and not helped her- and she would have left angry and ticket-less. By working together and keeping her cool (and always a splash of charm), she was able to drive home a happy woman.

Today, I got an email from that co-worker whom I shared this story with.

"I just had to tell you, your mom's 'get what she wants' technique is working out beautifully for me. Using the phrase 'why don't we come up with a solution together' is making my life sooo much easier!"

How great is that?! So you see, class, honey really does attract more bees than vinegar.

I, too, have recently used this technique when I picked up a pizza order only to get it home and find it cold. Apparently, they baked the pizza 4 hours earlier when my online order came through, ignoring the time i specified on my ticket.

When I called the manager, I politely asked him what kind of solution could we come up with to fix our predicament.

"I'm so sorry ma'am. I'll give you a nice credit for the next time you order pizza." (Little did he know my significant other is a Papa John's maniac.) I would say that was a score. Reheated the cold pizza, and have free pizza waiting on us this weekend. Bon Appetit.

Libby's List of Inexucusable Grammar Goofs

I have, as some would say, a few quirks. They're not necessarily bad (hey, I've lived with them this long!) but some people don't get why certain things irk me, or why I do things in my own special way (i.e: food on a plate. It isn't made for touching. My green beans would appreciate not being groped by my chicken, thankyouverymuch.)

I have compiled a list of some of the biggest contenders grating on my grammar quirk. If you do these things, we can no longer be friends. Okay, that's a bit harsh, but just know I WILL correct you and you WILL fix it and like it. That's what friends are for, after all.

And, before I give you said list, just know for all you parents out there: your kid using incorrect grammar is not cute. As much as you would like to label it as such, teach them proper English! You want your kid to earn high preschool honors, don't you?

Libby's List of Inexcusable Grammar Goofs

1. Asking a question such as, "Where's the party at?" cringe.
 Correction: "Where is the party?" or, "At whose house will the party be held?" There is no place named At, and if there was, no parties would be held behind it.

2. "Me and her are going to the mall."
  You hit 2 whammies with this one! Not only should you introduce others before yourself, but "her" goes nowhere. "She" does.
  Correction: "She and I are going to the mall."

3.  Couldn't Of/ Wouldn't of/ Shouldn't of
  Correction: Couldn't Have- or, could not have. As in, "I could not have a piece of candy. I wasn't allowed."
 I'm shaking my head as I type this because I never would have thought I would have to explain that... but my Facebook feed tells me otherwise.

4. Unnecessary Ellipses (AKA: ...)
  An ellipsis... isn't meant to just fill space... or introduce a thought... or transition into something else...
 (See also: "hyphen," which people also misuse in similar contexts.)
 Correction: An ellipsis is primarily used to show omitted words. As in: they were there, and now they are not. Yes, it may be used to show a pause or break in thought and context, but please... use... sparingly... and...only...when... absolutely...necessary (...)

5. To/Too
 Correction: If you have too much fun, you might forget to use the correct word. To me, that would just be too preposterous for words.


What are some of your grammar (or unrelated) pet peeves and quirks??

A Military Affair (The Dancing Kind)

Shane works in sports medicine and athletic training for the Marine Corps. He is great at his job and the people he works with really appreciate him.

This weekend, I was able to experience one of the job's perks- attending a military ball!

I love getting dolled up and fancy for a night out. Shane, well, he just loves appeasing me and my thrill of the frills!  Like I said, the man works in athletics. He is used to wearing a t-shirt and shorts. Tuxes just aren't really his thing... but boy, does he look great in one!

We danced, we ate, we met some really cool people. The world of the military is really fascinating to me. They have so much structure, uniformity, pride, and camaraderie. Somethings you just don't see everyday. And of course, they love to have a good time! Yep, count this girl in!